Women who face violence in their own country or abroad by their husbands/inmates, die many times before of their death! Moreover, the rate of violence against Bangladeshi women abroad is beyond imagination. In most of the cases victims are helpless, as they are in foreign land. I have tried to portray a simple picture of violence against Bangladeshi women abroad to realize how inhuman lives they live!

Most of the Bangladeshi female victims told me that when marrying a Bangladeshi groom from abroad, the parents or guardians are unable to collect enough information about the groom. As a result, they cannot but believe the information provided by the groom and the family. But after the wedding, when truth reveals, the wife starts suffering, nothing can be done. These women cannot but accept their fate.

Sometimes, the parents are tempted with grooms from abroad and marry of their daughters without gathering sufficient information about the groom.

I am certain that many of you know more or less about the violence against Bangladeshi women abroad. Yet I’d like to present here one of the touchy case studies of some sufferer and severely injured women to realise the reality and state of grave inhumanity, so that we can do something to contain similar incidents from taking place.

Koli (not her real name) was an educated girl and had a relationship with a guy living in Dhaka. They were planning to get married next February, on the Valetnine’s Day. But Koli’s parents got a proposal through a matchmaker that there is a Bangladeshi groom living in Sweden for the last few years. If they agree to marry Koli off with that groom, no dowry will be required better yet, the groom will bear the cost of the wedding. In addition, both Koli and her family members will be able to settle in Sweden. Very lucrative proposal indeed! Koli’s parents enthusiastically agreed to the proposal and the wedding took within five days without Koli’s consent.

An unwilling Koli set for Sweden with her husband. Within a few days of reaching there, Koli discovered that her husband drinks and have sexual relations with other women. And everytime Koli protested, the guy started to torture Koli – physically and mentally. Her husband kept her confined in the house – not allowing to outside or contact anyone. She wasn’t even permitted to contact her parents back in Bangladesh. She wasn’t allowed to touch her husband’s cellphone and call anyone. Koli could do nothing but live like a bird confined in a cage! She fell ill due to the torture and after suffering for a few days her reluctant husband took her to a doctor. Koli, however, did not disclose anything to the doctor, rather told him that she had gotten the injury marks on her body as she slipped and fell down in the bathroom.

After seven months Koli realised that she was pregnant. Hearing the news, her husband kicked her in the stomach and injured Koli lost her baby.

This is one of the many stories of violence against women abroad. In abroad, there are many Bangladeshi female victims of domestic violence. Some became disabled, unable to take legal action some took shelter in different rehabilitation centres. There are many with multiple wives. And when a victim shows courage to walk away, they are often denied right/access to their children.

Often some guys come up with false bio-data and the parents get swayed by their impressive CV. But once married, it’s often found that the guy’s CV is not only false, he’s unemployed or have criminal charges against him. Some even marry girls in Bangladesh only to sale them in brothels abroad or force them in sex trade.

It is suggested that the parents must gather detailed information from a reliable source before they even agree to marry their daughter off to foreign lands. In this connection, the parents might ask for information from the Bengali communities abroad, embassies or some other migrant citizens.

As there is not enough data on violence against Bangladeshi women abroad, necessary support, capacity-building and research must be conducted to address the issue and save lives of these hapless women. World Health Organization (WHO) estimates in 2002 that around 20-70% of abused women around the world never told another person about the abuse until being interviewed for a study by WHO.

Amnesty International mentioned that around the world at least one woman in every three has been beaten, coerced into sex, or otherwise abused in her lifetime. Every year, violence in the home and the community devastates the lives of millions of women. Violence against women is rooted in a global culture of discrimination which denies women equal rights with men. Amnesty added that there is an unbroken spectrum of violence that women face at the hands of people who exert control over them. States have the obligation to prevent, protect against, and punish violence against women whether perpetrated by private or public actors. States have a responsibility to uphold standards of due diligence and take steps to fulfil their responsibility to protect individuals from human rights abuses, the report concludes.

Experts suggested to ensure equality: non-violent relationship with women and men through:
• Fairness and negotiation;
• Honesty and accountability;
• Respect to the women;
• Trust and support;
• Shared responsibility;
• Positive parenting;
• Non-threatening behaviour;
• Economic partnership.

One question that always bothers me is why cant we ensure equal rights of women through their empowerment, why can’t we ensure gender equity and equality? The constitution the law is on our side! Then what’s holding us back?

I have been very glad and hopeful to learn that three committed and dedicated female human rights and peace activists have received this year’s Nobel Peace Prize. Those brilliant and scholar women include: Africa’s first female president, Ellen Johnson Sirleaf; Leymah Gbowee; from Liberia, and Tawakkul Karman of Yemen. I salute and congratulate them for their achievement. And I trust that they will help make more positive changes in the world especially in favour of women, and ensure peace and democracy.

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Parvez Babul a journalist and columnist in Bangladesh. Also the author of two books: 1) Women’s empowerment, food security and climate change (2010), 2) Violence against women and human rights (2011). He can be contacted at